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mainili's profile
Username mainili
Joined Jun 28, 2010
Location Istanbul
Interests art, dreaming, design
Website mainili.com
Occupation fantasy artist & designer
Biography I am a typical cancer who was born in a hot July morning at 1983. As I am always early, I was an early born, before 8 mounts over.

I was always over-naughty. Mothers around used to tell their children “I said, don’t see her!”, teachers used to call my parents every day.

I said to my dad, I want to be a designer, but he said “do you want to starve?” – Yes, in Turkey, being artist or designer means that. He said to me to do a money making job and then do what ever I want. So if things don’t go well, I can still make money for my living, shortly, securing my future. I was always rebellious but I tended to like this. Then I decided to be a doctor like my big brother, travelling the world and helping the needy, while drinking their soups, I could do art… But in Turkey, being a doctor as hard as being an artist.

I became an engineer, when the university is over, then I retired!

Being an engineer is easy, if you don’t sleep at all because, you never have enough time to study more. This left me unpracticed for art as I had no time for it. I had only the passion for what I wanted to do. No education, no practice, nothing at all…

And I had a psychotic illness called “borderline personality disorder” which makes my life difficult – and especially for people. But it had its own specialty as in a natural sense of chemistry; I see derivative flashbacks, in a non-real world environment within my mind. It’s like having seeing things in a fictional scene. Air has texture, feelings have colors. Everything has a symbol in my mind. It is more than necessity to illustrate if you see things like that. There is only one problem that I have no idea about drawing. I only had notebook pages and rotring pencil…I was drawing simple figures… no book, no lessons, nothing else… it improved, - I always said that, if someone else can do it, and if that someone else has hands like mine, then I can do it too. I just don’t have practice. – I did draw for 1 year long, and decided to pour my own ideas. So I am sharing by online gallery, what I can say…

Now I made this site – I am a computer engineer - and it is hopeful to make living from your art… displaying my brain is priceless.

I sometimes write poems or short stories that I will also share in a short time and design things from my flashbacks.

Turning point of my life was meeting with my husband, poet and composer Engin Kavrak. He showed me incredible angle of life… he must have been sent for me…

Now my love and I live in a coffee, melissa, and bergamot scented apartment on a mountain district outside of the messy Istanbul. We also have a photography studio at the same place.

Our life goes on in a loving cycle. Psychotic and childish…

And my real name is Nese Nilufer Kavrak which means Joy Nymph Firewood. I use mainili – it is Persian – means bluest indigo – it feels like me.

I love cats, trees, mushrooms, vegetables, leaves, vintage clothes and so on…

I hate war, fight, and classification.
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